The 2004 Waveland Chronicles

Friday, July 16, 2004

Brewers-3, Cubs-2.  Another great pitching performance by Matt Clement wasted as once again, the Cubs bats are stuck in a deep slumber.  This is getting ridiculous -- in his last six starts, the Cubs have only provided him seven runs. 
I think it's pretty obvious what needs doing here.  Get a live chicken, grab a shot or two of Jobu's rum and do whatever is necessary to wake up those bats.   Anyone have Dennis Haysbert's phone number?  
Pedro Cerrano: Bats, they are sick. I cannot hit curveball. Straightball I hit it very much. Curveball, bats are afraid. I ask Jobu to come, take fear from bats. I offer him cigar, rum. He will come.
Eddie Harris: You know you might think about taking Jesus Christ as your savior instead of fooling around with all this stuff.
Pedro Cerrano: Jesus, I like him very much, but he no help with curveball.
Eddie Harris: You trying to say Jesus Christ can't hit a curveball?
Friday, July 16: BP-16 [W-15,S-1], Roof-0, Foul-0, HR-0

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